As a long time applied psychologist I have spent many years working with, and fascinated by, the cognitive, thinking parts of the brain. However, when I experienced several closely timed losses what I discovered I really needed couldn’t be found in my thinking brain but resided in the mind-body connection. I no longer recognised my body, I felt numb and detached emotionally; my muscles and fascia system were rigid as I had braced through the illness and death of loved ones. This meant significant body tightness including jaw tension and shoulder and neck tightness affecting my ability to turn my head and causing repeated headaches. Feelings of panic came apparently from nowhere and affected my sleep. I recognised that I continued to be in survival mode. The experience was humbling as, on an intellectual level, I understood the ‘body kept the score’; I had repeatedly witnessed this when supporting schools, social care colleagues and adoptive parents in their work with young people with developmental trauma, grief and loss. However, it was different to experience this on a personal level, albeit to a small extent, for what I perceived as highly common traumas.

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What followed was a new pathway, a slowing down, a commitment to the mind-body and practices that I valued but never gave the the time to. My explorations bought me to Brainspotting, which I felt drawn to despite not fully understanding what it was all about! Intuitively I booked a place on a course just as it was closing. Phase one training was fascinating, I witnessed and experienced Brainspotting's power and its gentleness and became hooked. A natural progression, of course, has been a desire to use this powerful modality to help others on their journey to growth and healing. 

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